long time ago someone had told me ” u need to condition ur brain to rule ur relationships” never really gave it a thought…. am use to wearing my heart on my-sleeves, enjoying every attachment it brings and the heart breaks it gives….. sometimes i get over them soon sometimes it takes years and yet after all this time has passed i still think i am at square 1……….

the confused me ……….. iconic idiot and yet proud of my self of being so…. know why ?

lately i have been studying to be a pre primary teacher…. the college is all women’s college i guess teaching in early childhood education system does require a lot of patience and that is not a male characteristic……heheheh no offence meant havent found ne one with this characteristic till date……..

well so this particular studying gave me an opportunity to meet alot of people – females and interact with them in various situations …….. to see how they react ? what do they think ? how do they work their way around to get things done ? learnt a lot ……. application questionable……….. hehehe

one thing i realised was that most of them are closed individuals…… closed to new ideas…….. closed to new thoughts…….. closed to new way of thinking….. closed to learning new things in life…….. and then i wondered if they are so closed how can they ever grow ? how can they ever be a teacher who shapes the new individuals without accepting the fact that every single entity in our lives has something to teach us ?

i like taking everything that happens to my heart and being emotional towards my work and studies ……… that attaches me to it and brings the best out…….. that gives me the strength to reach for excellence in my own way………. wonder what would be the trigger factor for these ladies and what if i ever have to manage such a slot would i do to get my work done from them………

sometimes i am damm jealous of our coordinator……… she really makes it a point to get all the work done from all of us and yet put up a friendly front…….. learning tricks of trade is a fun thing……… miss my mentors in all my previous jobs ……… miss being with them and understanding how things work in real world…….. the world i am currently in is very ideal and doesnt really get me newhere near the reality ………. cant wait to be in market where i am able to experiment with really work and show results……… 

so much for wearing my heart on my sleeves and enjoying the life as it comes !!!!!!!!!