It’s not her usual colour, she is generally blue, calm, deep, beneath her still surface there may be a war raging war, maybe the whole episode of the tragedy that might have been played over and over again, but her surface is always still… mirror still…

Her reds, her yellows, her royal purples were known, were seen. She was bright orange, often when there were deadlines, her anxieties her annoyance towards the inefficiencies, her excitements of achieving something new were evidently visible.

Green was too harsh, green was a start of insecurity, a want, demand of attention, the desperation of acknowledgement. She didn’t have to try hard….

Yet she glowed of green today, not the new shoots kind of green, not the soothing in hot summer kind of green, it was the venus fly trap kind of green, it was the mucky moss on the surface of the pond gathered, dense, deep not allowing anything to survive beneath kind of green.

The green glow was evident, the mix of red, the feeling of blue and the reality of brown. She could feel the struggle, her core was experiencing to survive. Every new day, the same realisation, the same truth, the same existential crises and the same uphill walk of maintaining the blue.

Days went by, the blue fading, oranges ruled the glows, busy with achievement masked green.

Green, however, didn’t vanish, it took halt, a respite, brewed within the unknown depths, growing by each acknowledgement of reality. Taking over piece by piece, corner by corner, it metamorphosed in different ways, sometimes shades of brown, sometimes mucky orange…

The glow of blue was diminishing, fading miserably.. till she could hold it no longer… the green now ruled… all of it, the blue, the red, the yellow, the orange, the purples… all had the shade of green ingrained.

 

What remained now was the strong emerald glow beaming in the dark and her constant struggle to conjure the green of still, new shoots, serene, soothing in summer glow….

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